funny welding sayings

[Bostick101]

I gots a few I've heard over the years:

1. When in doubt, Grind it out!
2. When the hood drops, the bull**** stops.
3. Aint nothing finer than a pipeliner.
4. I wipe my a$$ with pipeline trash!
5. I spit, you shine. I weld, you grind!
6. I got two speeds, Slow and dead stop.

[gnm109]

I don't subscribe to this one, but I heard it on another site.

There's no bad welding, only poor grinding".

[wiebeweld]

I was working with an oldtimer who had just tacked up a pipe, fitter starts banging it, welder yells, "its a tack, not a hinge!"

[damiencwb]

stickerheadz.com has some great stickers you can buy. the one i got are

its all good in the hood (it has a pic of a welding hood on it)
i weld for money you want loyalty buy a dog
W.A.S.P. welders against stupid pipefitters

[ManoKai]

"Mo hotter, mo better!". Ripped from an offshore pro welder back in da day.

[mike837go]

Shoulda welded yur butt cheeks together to keep that size 12 boot out.

Now THAT is an awkward welding postion.

Requires having your head up there already, don't it?

[Stick.it.to.em]

"That's what you call gorilla welding, ugly but strong."

[Welder Dave]

Welders burn bigger rods
Welders get deeper penetration
and a bumper sticker from way back..."Pipeliners are professional layers"

[weldbead]

he can weld a fart under cold water
i'm gonna put my boot so deep in your *** you gonna need a proctologist and a shoemaker to get over it

[Ian Duffin]

He can weld cat **** to a plate glass window

[Recruit]

Sparks fly when the rod penetrates.

[Recruit]

Mig welders pass more gas.

[Ti Trucker]

Here's two my classmates used to say in college

1. Welders have the hottest rods and
2. Burning rods and banging broads

They tried to find one that was more fitting for me (a woman) but all they came up with was welder chick.

Here's one i saw on the internet: Welders know which cracks to fill

[ottomatic67]

What do you say to a guy with an IQ of 13
Tack it up.

[Kev]

I used to sell computer ink cartridges. Once in awhile someone would come in with an empty one in their hand and say, "I just bought this not long ago. How long are they supposed to last?" I just wanted to plant my palm to my forehead. Good grief. They could be printing a single period in the middle of a sheet or they could be printing a four inch square, solid black box. How long are they supposed to last? Come on now.

A few weeks ago I was carting in a new bottle to hang on the back of the Miller 251 in one of the hog nursery rooms. One of the guys on the crew was up on a two-stepper gluing some PVC near the ceiling. He asked me, "How long do one of those usually last?" Come on now.

Kev

[wornoutoldwelder]

"I can weld shoes on a mule with 6013, a tractor battery and jumper cables"

[BD1]

It is not funny but we use to say, “dime wide, nickel high” when using a 1/8” diameter electrode.

[RodJ]

Attended the casing ceremony for a Texas Army Natl Guard maintenance and repair unit going to Iraq some years ago where my brother in law was a welder. I'll never forget their unit motto: "If we can't fix it, it ain't broke."

He spent it seemed all his time in Iraq on his back welding steel plate reinforcement to the undersides of vehicles for IED protection. He shed a lot of tears afterward for the ones he couldn't protect well enough.

No one carries the weight of the world on their shoulders like soldiers, airmen, seamen and marines. Even the welders. God bless them all.

[wnywelder]

My favorite: "I can weld anything, I can even weld your a**hole shut if you stand still long enough."

[bakodiver]

We're winers, we're diners
We're dirty pipeliners
High hookers, good lookers
Cigarette fiends and sex machines.

Alberta, circa 1981.

[MinnesotaDave]

Anything is a hammer...
unless it's a screwdriver, then it's a chisel...

unless you can weld, then it's whatever you want it to be

[MinnesotaDave]

[knob rabbit]

I say watch the welder, my black Labrador says watch it yourself, my eyes are killing me.

[weldnhack]

I was complimenting one of the guys on my crew on a project he welded out, I said to him, those are good welds, without missing a beat a guy from another crew who had come over to check it out said " any weld you get paid for is a good weld.

[cwby]

Good gosh Gerty, What a gash!

Old welder I used to work with to poor fit up.